Tag Archives: #AutismPositivity

Autistic Healers Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014

By Kmarie 

2e0db-screen-shot-2014-04-21-at-6-45-04-pmIn the last week alone I have faced four different “Newsworthy” negative reports on Autism advertised as “breakthroughs, ” “understanding Autism,” or “valid research”, and each one has left me in tears because these reports are what the world listens to. But then I found a glimmer of hope in the Autism Positivity Flashblog and my Autistic community. We can be a voice. I can be a voice.

I have several friends, family members and people in my community who are Autistic. They are a diverse group of people with different needs, beliefs and temperaments…but the one aspect I often find my Autistic friend’s have in common are their healing personalities. The lie that Autistics are non empathetic or non communicative is exposed when I am around each of them. They are the people who children and animals flock to, whether they want them to or not due to sensory issues. My Autistic friends are often the people whom the outcasts of society, the abused and the down trodden go to for a listening ear, for compassion and because these people groups feel the Autistics are safe. Generally we are. It is very rare for an Autistic to not be safe, innocent and pure of heart. In the news we hear the horror stories but most often, there are other factors at work that should be exposed. The very stats speak for themselves; the number of Autistic people that commit crimes in the overall population of Autistics verses the number of Nuerotypical people that commit crimes in their overall population makes the issue stunningly clear. Autism does not create violence. Like in any population group, there will be issues but in general, the Aspies I know are trustworthy, kind and considerate.

I am an Aspie/ Autistic and I am 30. I have three children and am married to an NT. We have a happy life. Contrary to popular Autism propaganda we have had a happy 12 year marriage and while having children was hard for me at first, I now love being a mom. While it is true that I can not face meal time every day without my husband or support system nor drive in the city due to executive functioning issues, I also KNOW I give back to the world with my unique set of gifts. Without a doubt Autistics need more support because the current culture is not set up for us. Instead of people fighting Autism we need them to fight Ignorance and stigma. 

There are many parents and practitioners who claim they are reversing autism in children.  They are not “reversing” the way the brain is wired…what is actually happening from the perspectives of Autistics is that they are helping deal with sensory onslaught or other symptoms of Autism that interfere with social interactions and minimizing them. For example, many Autistics have a leaky gut so going off of gluten really helps them think clearer to deal with sensory onslaught of the loud culture we live in, but our actual brain wiring is still unique and different. Cognitive therapy also helps re wire some anxiety that we experience due to being “differently wired” and can aid us in being thought of as more “normal” but we are still Autistic. Just with less “symptoms.” Technically these claims of reversals are actually just improving assimilation, which is fine in some cases but it needs to actually be addressed as it is, and it actually is an ethical conundrum that needs serious consideration. Many Autistic adults who can speak for themselves will tell you this. My son does not seem very Autistic on the outset, because we have worked with him since age 3 on eye contact and anxiety so he is less bullied, but he still works from a different mind theory than an NT. 

I may not fit into society the way it wants me to but I still am valuable and live a worthy life. I feel that if we get too genetically focused on Autism and too focused on “eradicating Autism”, this issue will become quite akin to what Hitler wanted to achieve. Let’s not go there. Diversity is the spice of life, we can help disabling features while still respecting the core…

Read the rest of this post at:http://worldwecreate.blogspot.ca/2014/04/autistic-healers.html

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Moments: Happy Birthday, Teenagers! #AutismPositivity2013

By Tyann Sheldon Rouw

More than ten years ago, I worked with Clark, a man at the University of Northern Iowa who was nearing retirement age. I was pregnant with twins at the time, and many of my colleagues had children of their own. Once in a while, Clark would sit with us in our cubicles late on a Friday afternoon after a long week of work and shoot the breeze. One day he shared that when he thought about his life and how it unfolded, there were certain moments he would never forget. He listed them: getting married while being surrounded by family and friends, becoming a father when his first son was born, and becoming the father of two boys when his youngest son entered the world. Then he told the story of putting pajamas on his two young boys after dinner, loading them into the car with his wife, and taking them out for ice cream. He said it became a fun family tradition.

I’ve never forgotten those words.

At the time I didn’t know if he was just talking to talk, but now I think he had a more important message for us young people: Don’t lose sight of your relationships and your roles. Remember who is important. And have fun.

This week my twin sons turn thirteen years old. Teenagers. We celebrated last Easter weekend with my in-laws at their home. We stayed at a hotel because Isaac is hard to buy for, but he loves experiences. Hotels are at the top of his list. What’s not to love? Elevators, a swimming pool, a breakfast buffet . . . it doesn’t get much better for him.

I’ve been thinking about the moments from the last week I won’t soon forget:

I stood in the kitchen one morning and asked the boys if they wanted to dye eggs after school. Isaac,who was sitting in the living room, shouted, “Yes!”  (He was in another room and answered me. Wowza!) Last year he put two eggs in different cups of dye and retreated to the basement. Not this year. Every boy had an equal number of eggs to color, but I’m pretty sure Isaac colored more than his fair share. He even stuck around to wash all of the cups…

Read this post in its entirety at:http://tyannsheldonrouw.weebly.com/1/post/2014/04/weekend-moments-happy-birthday-teenagers.html

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AutAc Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014

By Dani Alexis

It’s Autism Positivity Day 2014, which seems to me the ideal day for launching this blog.

This project started in a battered spiral notebook I keep next to my bed.  When I started writing, I wasn’t sure I wanted to blog something as intensely personal as an autobiography.  And I’m still not sure.

But there is something wonderfully positive and affirming about writing, specifically, about my autism.  I’m not alone in this; by writing about my autism, I join a community of writers and bloggers of which I’m proud to be a part.

There’s also something wonderfully affirming about autobiography, or memoir, or life writing.  This is particularly true when one is autistic.  It is a persistent irony that so many researchers of autism – themselves neurotypical – continue to believe simultaneously that autistic people are fatally self-absorbed and that autistic people are incapable of writing meaningfully about their own lives…

Read this post in its entirety at: http://autisticacademic.wordpress.com/2014/04/30/autac-expressions-of-posautivity-autismpositivity2014/

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What is Autism Positivity? Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014

By Amy Sequenzia

We fight against stigmas. We fight to be heard.
The world is not generally friendly to Autistics. We still need to remind people that the same rights they have, rights they expect to be recognized, also apply to us.

We celebrate Autism Positivity because we know we are not a collection of deficits. We know that because we, like everyone else, have assets, abilities and gifts.

We know this because we are human beings.Autism Positivity 2014

Autistics can be extra sensitive to sound and light. While this is seen as a deficit by a majority that is still not accepting of the need for accommodations, Autistics can experience the beauty of the colors in music, in the words we hear, and in the people around us. We can see the wind and hear the silence.

We celebrate Autism Positivity because we experience amazing beauty most people can’t see.

Many of us can’t speak like the majority can. That’s also is seen as a broken feature. But we are listening and learning at a faster pace than the neuromajority is. Give us the opportunity and the right technology, and our thoughts will enrich your life.

We celebrate Autism Positivity because what is inside our minds is worthy the wait to hear our typed, written voices.

Autism Positivity is the freedom to flap, rock, spin and jump.
It is the accepting presence of those who “get it”.

Autism Positivity is feeling intensely every emotion around us.
It is felling safe and finding comfort being alone, with ourselves.

Autism Positivity is having the courage to be ourselves.
It is seeing our lives and actions help young autistics to do the same.

Autism positivity is learning to say “no” to forced compliance.
It is refusing stereotypes, it is fighting stigma and wrong assumptions.

Autism Positivity is reclaiming our right to make decisions.
It is rebelling against practices that seek to fix what is not broken.
We are not broken.

Autism Positivity is exercising our humanity.

We celebrate Autism Positivity because we are human beings and we are pretty awesome, in our Autistic way.

 

Original post at AWN (Autism Women’s Network): http://autismwomensnetwork.org/what-is-autism-positivity-expressions-of-posautivity-autismpositivity2014/

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Pensiveaspie Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014

By Pensiveaspie

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I wanted to write a blog about all the positive and supportive things friends/family members have said to us.

I wanted to fill this post with hope and love so others could be inspired, so I reached out again to my aspie groups and asked for their stories.

What I found was disheartening. I guess I should say what I didn’t find: support.  When I asked my fellow aspies to share hurtful things friends and family had said to them, I was overwhelmed with responses.  When I asked for positive and supportive things from friends and family, I gave them over a week to respond.  Still, the answers were sparse:

Wendy W. – “Wow, that must have been tough

Candice S. – When I told my husband, his reply was “I know” in a very casual tone. His 2 words said everything. They said that he loves the way I am and that includes the AS.

Kelly S. – “Don’t worry, you’ve always done things in your own time.”

Sue A. – “I’m glad you found answers and are embracing who you are.”
“Thank you for being so open and sharing your experience!”
“It’s good that you know this about yourself and what you can do to work on the things you want to improve on.”

So I changed the question.
Last night, I asked “Tell me something that another ASPIE has said to you that made you feel loved and supported.”  I was delighted to see this many responses in less than 24 hours!:

Abby N. – I am kind and understanding

Colin S. – I‘m glad to have met you. Your knowledge is a gift.

Aletheia K. – “I’ve felt the same way all my life, but you actually put it into words!” Or, more simply and profoundly: “Me too.”

Aubrey M. – “We are so much alike”

J.J. B. – My aspie friend has helped me by just listening and not judging

Ron K. – I understand.

Claudia A – Well, you are different. I think it’s great, and if someone doesn’t like it they can go f*** themselves.

Alyce A. – Twins!

Debby T. – We can be weird together!

Julia R.  – Being with other people with ASD can be amazing, especially if you have similar interests, and similar ways of being and communicating. I have several family members with ASD, and just being around them can feel so good because there’s no pressure to be anything different. Also I’ve finally started to understand and appreciate how earlier generations of people with AS in my family organized their lives so as to benefit from the positive aspects of AS and to minimize the more challenging and potentially disabling parts. So it’s not so much what anyone has said, it’s just the sense of the pleasure of feeling completely normal while being around others who are very similar. While also learning from them that you can be autistic and live a good life.

John T. – You guys are the only Aspies I know and you always say nice things to me.

Anne. L. – The facilitator of the Aspie Womens Group commented on how lucky my daughter is to have an Aspie Mom. I bring a level of insight and empathy to her parenting that it is unlikely an NT parent could. I really hadn’t thought about it that way before.

Sherri S. – I admire you a lot. You seem so self-possessed and competent and unruffled.  You have a golden heart.  That’s not weird. I do that too! It is more than just words. It’s a feeling of connection and acceptance. Immediate, unconditional acceptance.

Robin H. – Often times, when others say they have “been there”, they say it with a sharp tone that we’ve learned means we’re stupid and implies “quit your whining you aren’t the only one”. Whereas when my friends who are Aspies say they have “been there”, it is explained with distinct empathy showing their hearts are in sync with mine. If only the rest of the world could know how lonely of a place it is when others do not connect in that way with us.

Kerrilynn H. – You are an inspiration to others. You help others in their journeys by being so open about mine.

Anna W. –  You’re not mad, you’re not wrong, and I rather like you.  You’re neither mad nor hopeless, you’re wonderful.  You are Anna and regardless of what label anyone chooses to slap on you or whatever metaphorical box you may be put in, you will still be Anna.

Ashley M. – I know you asked what supportive things others have said to me, but being supportive of others makes me feel loved and supported myself!  Here is something another Aspie said to me: You give me strength. Because you have been so open about your Asperger’s, I finally feel like I have the strength to find my own voice. Thank you for always being so supportive.

Jenny S. – I get you. Nobody had ever told me that before.

Wendy W. – I feel a connection with you that I’ve never felt with anyone else before- I feel like we’re twins.

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I was sad to see such a lack of support from our friends and family.  At the same time I was overjoyed with how accepting and supportive other Aspies are to each other.  Sometimes, our family isn’t our best support system.  Sometimes, we have to find our own.

If you have Asperger’s or Autism and you are not feeling supported by friends and family, reach out.

There are many support groups online – especially on facebook.  Search twitter for #aspie. Email me.  There is connection and acceptance here. There is friendship here.  You are most definitely NOT alone. <3
Go where the love is.

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Original post at:http://wp.me/p4qqov-4v

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A is for Anxiety: Expressions of PosAutivity: #AutismPositivity2014

By R

Recently I’ve blogged about the possibility that my son has Aspergers syndrome and the long journey we have started as parents trying to get him an assesment and appropriate help at school (indeed today we had a positive meeting with the Special Needs Co-ordinator (Senco) at his school).

Today, as my small part of Autism Positivity, I thought I’d go off topic on this blog again (after all, it’s supposed to be about my mental health) and shout something out to anyone that’s listening.

My son is wonderful and there’s is absolutely nothing wrong with him!

And I absolutely mean that. He is kind, helpful, inquisitive, friendly, cuddly, energetic, generous, inventive, knowledgable, thoughtful. Actually I’m a bit wary of writing a list of adjectives about him, as I’m bound to leave some of his great qualities out. I love him and he’s great. There is nothing wrong with him and I don’t want to change him in any way.

So why all the letters to doctors and conversations with schools?

Because I want to change other people. I want to change the way they behave with him.

Whatever diagnosis he does or doesn’t end up with, I know that he’s not your average child. I mean, every mum thinks their child is extra special, but more than that he certainly seems to think and behave a little differntly from some of his peers.

But different doesn’t mean wrong…

Read the complete post here: http://aisforanxiety.wordpress.com/2014/04/30/expressions-of-posautivity-autismpositivity2014/

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Love is the Language and Making Connections #AutismPositivity2014

By Yuk-Lung Chan

‘Love is the language’ By Yuk-Lung Chan

 

 

Making Connections

‘Making Connections’ By Yuk-Lung Chan

 

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